Looking for excitement? Philosophical conversation? A free beer or six? Grab a good book, hoist a travel mug full of coffee, don a ruggedly handsome face and a thick pair of legs, and saunter on over to Dupont circle when the weather's fair and the breeze is fresh.
I was sitting on a bench when a fellow approached and sat down. Moments later, he apologized for blowing smoke in my face--I hadn't even noticed, due to the cleansing wind--and stood up. Shortly after, he engaged me in conversation--small talk. Sports, girls, marriage, my open book, anything that came to mind.
I was just beginning to lose interest and yearning to get back to my reading when he offered to buy me a beer. I didn't need to look at my watch to know it was hardly beer-thirty, but I acquiesced anyway, despite the warning klaxons screaming in my head.
Shut up, I scolded, there's no way this guy can do anything to you against your will. Better watch out for roofies though, my afterthought added.
I figured I'd go to a bar, sip a drink, and leave to scoop my lovely lady from work. No harm, no foul.
The first bar we entered was an Irish pub where, to my embarrassment (and moderate relief) I discovered I had exchanged my ID for my visitor's pass, and I was without age-verification.
Undeterred, Chuck led the way to the next bar. Same story: No ID, no drink.
Instead, we went to a liquor store, where I picked out an IPA. No sense in wasting a perfectly good opportunity. After all, Chuck instructed me to pick Whatever I Wanted. (In the bar, my first instinct had been to go for Chivas. Chuck had opted for vodka/cranberry--yet another dead giveaway.)
Sixpack in hand, I accompanied Chuck back to the grassy traffic circle where I poured a bottle into my emptied coffee mug and proceeded to drink in public. He told me about his musical career. The conversation was wholesomely bro-ish, and I felt in no way threatened. I guess he just liked to hear philosophy and bullshit from a strapping young straight guy.
As we parted ways--I toward a pair of beautiful bouncy breasts and flowing, herbal-scented hair, and he toward whatever he had planned for the rest of the day--Chuck got a phone call. He said it was a Marine whose Marine wife had just been sent to Iraq. The guy wanted Chuck to pick up some weed and join him for a sordid sodomitic romp in the Pentagon...